Every Tuesday night of my junior year of college, I would drive twenty minutes north of my college campus to where I led WyldLife—a Christian outreach ministry—and pick up middle school girls for a Bible study. We would jam out in the car to Justin Bieber or the High School Musical soundtrack and they would tell me stories from their weeks (which would range from math tests to toe nails falling off in the middle of class). Starbucks was always our go-to hang out spot. The smell of warmed pumpkin loaves filled the air as we sipped on our pink drinks around the table and talked about our lives. We shared about the really sweet moments that happened that week along with the not so fun things that we were walking through. We read Scripture and talked about what it looked like to follow Jesus. My time with those girls was always rich and full of love and laughter. I look back on my time with them and I’m so grateful I had the privilege of walking with them through eighth grade before they went on to high school. I was constantly reminded of what childlike faith looks like when I was with them, but what I learned most that year was the importance of discipleship.
What is your immediate reaction when you hear the word “discipleship”? Maybe you hear that word and don’t believe you are capable, or even required, to have such a role in the body of Christ. You may get anxious because you cannot imagine being vulnerable and inviting someone into the reality of your life. Or maybe you get excited about it! Wherever you’re at, my prayer is that we can discover our true calling as followers of Christ with open hearts and minds.
Before we talk about anything else, we need to look at what discipleship is. If we read the end of Matthew 28, Jesus is very clear with our calling:
“And Jesus came to them and said, ‘All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all thatI have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.’”
Matthew 28:18-20
Our calling as followers of Christ is simple: to make disciples. The word “disciple” can be translated as mathétés in Greek, which means student or apprentice; someone who is learning from someone else.1 When Jesus first started his ministry, he modeled this when he invited twelve men to join him, to travel with him, and to learn from him. “Follow me , and I will make you fishers of men,” was Jesus’ invitation (Matthew 4:19). With no hesitation, Peter, Andrew, James, and John, walked away from their fishing boat—the only thing they’ve ever known—and immediately stepped into life with Jesus. For the next three years, they learned what it meant to walk with God, to pray, to be obedient, and to love all people regardless of their culture, social status, or job. They ate meals and traveled from town to town with one another; they did life alongside each other.
Jesus modeled what true discipleship looked like: it’s inviting people to come alongside you, shoulder to shoulder, and sharing with them the truth of who Jesus is as you go. This was first modeled to me when I was in high school. My small group leader, Shelly, consistently showed up in my life. I never had to wonder if she would be at our youth group each Sunday. Shelly would see me and give me the biggest hug. When I would sleep over at her house or was over for a youth event, I found myself always drawn to helping her make breakfast or preparing things because I just wanted to be around her and learn from her. Shelly invited me into her life and loved me no matter how much of a hot mess I was.
Think back on your life. Who are the people who have poured into you? I believe a lot of us may have not been in a defined discipleship friendship with someone, and therefore think no one has poured into our lives. I thought that for a long time until I looked back on my life and made a list of all the people who have poured into me and what I have learned from them:
- Shelly and Dina (high school small group leaders): how to protect my heart and that God will be the only consistent thing in my life
- Katie (friend, WyldLife co-leader, and discipler): to never lose my wonder of Christ
- Malory (friend and college Bible study leader): the importance of being rooted in Scripture; this will help me to know my identity
- Soraya (friend and WyldLife co-leader): to first seek after Christ, and everything else will follow. What it looks like to be a constant vessel for Christ
- Jenna (friend and discipler): the importance of prayer and having an open hand posture in life
Those are just a few of the women who have poured into my life. Some of those women just showed up, but some I intentionally asked to be a part of my life and disciple me. I want to recognize that it takes a lot of courage to ask someone to disciple you. I’ve had a lot of people tell me they are not ready to be discipled because they cannot fathom being vulnerable with someone else or they just believe they don’t need it. I get it! It’s scary to allow someone in, to let them know anything and everything about you. Ecclesiastes states:
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
Society tells us that we are supposed to depend on our own strength—that we don’t need others. But God’s plan for the world is counterculture. God created the model of discipleship so we would not have to walk through life alone. Discipleship begins with inviting someone into your life who you admire for how they live their life, the way they lead their family, their marriage, etc. Eventually walls will come down and being vulnerable will feel safe. Where there is vulnerability, there is great freedom. God designed vulnerability for his glory and for us to receive an abundance of grace through it.
Not only should we be looking ahead to see who could be discipling us, but we should be looking to who is standing right by our side. Because Jesus invited the twelve to be disciples and to walk alongside him in his ministry, a deep and rich community formed among them. Jesus was pouring into them as they got to be shoulder to shoulder, walking with each other. The same is true for us. God has provided a place for us to find people to walk shoulder to shoulder with: the Church. Community is an essential part of discipleship because life was never intended to be done alone. We see the disciples all throughout the Book of Acts come back together to pray, reflect on Scripture, and to share meals together as they go out and share the good news of the gospel with the world. We need a community to be walking with us as we pour into others and hold us accountable to discipleship for ourselves.
Lastly, as we look to who is in front of and beside us, we cannot neglect to turn around to see who is behind us. Who are those we could be pouring into? I know there is probably some hesitancy in our heart when we hear this. Some feel there is a high view of discipleship within the body of Christ and that only certain people can do it. But that idea is far from the truth and does not align with God’s plan for the world. We have ALL been called to make disciples and we need YOU because God has gifted you for such a time as this. Discipleship is God’s big plan for the kingdom.
This was not a calling for certain people; it’s a calling for everyone. Maybe some of you hear that and are hesitant; you believe you are too broken to disciple someone. Maybe it’s because you believe you’re not ready or that you are not knowledgeable enough. Don’t let self-doubt be what stops you. In Exodus 3, we see Moses doubt that he is the right person to lead the nation of Israel. When Moses communicates his fears and doubts to the Lord, the Lord responds with encouragement, instruction, and promise. God can speak to our doubts, too, if we let him. If you feel like you’re not equipped to be a disciple-maker, bring those doubts to God and ask him to change your heart:
- “Jesus I am broken, but you are in me and I am a reflection of you!”
- “My path may not have always been straight, but I believe you can use my experiences to help meet others where they aret.”
- “I don’t know everything about the Bible, but I’m excited to learn with someone! Open my eyes and heart to your Word and allow the Spirit to help me understand.”
We tend to give ourselves these standards of readiness, but God did not put those on us. He asked us to first believe and then to go make disciples. He did not ask us to know everything about Scripture and to have it all together. He is asking us to show up.
That is where we start: showing up. Start with ice cream runs, morning walks, or going shopping. Start with getting coffee or by inviting them to join you and your family for dinner. I often find myself making pancakes for my WyldLife girls on Saturday mornings then playing Exploding Minions with them. Other days I simply pick them up because they want to go grocery shopping with me. This is what discipleship is about: showing up and inviting others into our lives.
This past April, I sat down with my friend Jenna and asked her if she would be willing to disciple me. We got coffee the morning of her due date with Vera June, her first born. Her life was about to drastically change; she was going to be a first time mom and was adjusting to what staying at home meant for her. I wasn’t sure if she would say “yes.” Still, I felt the Lord leading me to ask her, so I did. She ended up saying “yes” and not only did she agree, but she was excited that I asked! About two months after Vera was born, we started meeting weekly. We sip coffee at her house, go on walks, and play with Vera and her dog Hugo. Jenna would have already been doing all of these things, but she invites me to do it with her. In the midst of all of this, we talk about Jesus, we read his Word, and share what he is teaching us.
It is these relationships, like the one I have with Jenna, that empower me to go out and pour into middle school girls. The first time I actively did this was with those WyldLife girls my junior year of college. I felt ill-equipped and didn’t really know what I was doing. Because of my own story and experience with Christ, I realized that I knew a lot more than I thought I did. I may have not known everything about the Bible, but I definitely knew God’s heart for his people because of how he transformed my own life. You have the ability to learn alongside people, your story is worthy enough to get you started!
None of us are trained or equipped to do this, but because of God’s love for us, he will equip us to be able to disciple others in a way that is best suited for each of us. I fully believe God will transform our lives through our calling of discipleship.
Reflection
- Make a list of all the people who have poured into you. Once you have your list, reflect on these questions for each person:
- What have each of them taught you?
- How did they show up in your life?
- What is your posture toward discipleship? What do you believe is holding you back from inviting someone into your life or going out and discipling others?
- Make a list of who is in front, beside, and behind you. If you aren’t sure, that’s okay! Ask God to bring someone along for you to disciple or be discipled by.
Practical Next Steps
- Being Discipled: Think about what you want to learn from someone. That will help narrow down who to ask. If you don’t know who to ask, ask your connections director at church or a trusted friend to point you toward someone.
- Side by Side: The easiest way to find people to walk with you side by side is at church! Join a community group or start serving and be consistent in showing up. Relationships will start to form overtime.
- Discipling others: Think about the people in this world and where your heart breaks for others. Do you enjoy being around middle school, high school, or college students? Do you feel drawn to the homeless or friends with disabilities? Have you considered discipling a neighbor or sibling? From there, find ways to get connected with ministries whether that is within the church or the community!
Footnotes
1 Greg Herrick, “2. Understanding The Meaning of the Term “Disciple,'” Go and Make Disciples of All Nations. Published May 11, 2004. Bible.org: https://bible.org/seriespage/2-understanding-meaning-term-disciple (December 21, 2022).
Photo credit: Emily Brustoski
Carly is a lover of Raising Cane’s, living by the water, and all things middle school. She’s on staff with Young Life in Norfolk, VA and can often be found at a middle school volleyball game cheering on her friends or playing Throw Throw Burrito with her community group. She has a huge heart for watching people grow in their relationship with Jesus and for people to know God’s heart through Scripture.
